Since my unborn son kicked me for the first time, I have reflected greatly on how and what I will teach him. What kind of man will he become? How did I become the man I am today? So I plan to compile the life lessons, quotes, stories and experiences that have had the biggest impact on my life. My hope is that by reflecting on these, and what they taught me I can discover the true Makings Of A Man and give my son all the opportunities necessary to become the great man that I know he can be.
Friday, September 23, 2011
What Will You Put on the Alter?
It’s common to hear people say, “That will cost an arm and a leg.” Or “I’d give my right arm for that.” In 2003 Aron Ralston literally gave his right arm in order to achieve what he wanted. In his case what he wanted was simply to live and start a family. While hiking alone through Canyonlands National Park in Utah, Ralston suddenly found himself trapped when an 800 lb boulder became dislodged and crushed his hand and forearm, pinning him against the canyon wall. He spent the next 127 hours trying to chip away the rock and free himself with nothing but a cheap multitool. He rationed his very limited supply of food and water in an attempt to stay alive as long as possible. I’m sure he spent a lot of time in those days evaluating what he had to live for. And then after being stuck there for over 100 hours, he saw a vision of himself and his future son, and in that moment he knew exactly what he had to live for.
It was then that he decided he was willing to do the unthinkable in order to realize that vision. Aron’s desire to have a family became stronger than his desire to not cut off his own arm. Using his dull multi tool he began making exploratory cuts into his own forearm only to realize that he would not be able to cut through his bones. So he used the leverage of his pinned arm and snapped his radius and his ulna. With both bones in his forearm broken, he went about cutting through his own skin, muscle and nerves until he was free. After freeing himself he started the 8 mile hike back to his car and civilization. He managed to rappel down a 65 foot sheer wall, before he came across some hikers who rushed to alert authorities. By the time rescuers picked him up he had lost 40 pounds and 25% of his blood volume.
Throughout history all kinds of cultures and religions have offered sacrifices in order to get something they wanted. The idea was that if they offered a worthy sacrifice to their god(s), then the deity would bless them with the things they wanted. They understood that the greater the sacrifice, the greater the reward. In The Old Testament Abraham was asked to sacrifice to sacrifice his own son on the altar. We know that The Lord didn’t allow him to go through with the sacrifice, but Abraham left Mount Moriah with the knowledge that he was willing to put anything on the altar in order to please God. Aron Ralston quite literally put his own arm on the altar in order to achieve the life he wanted.
Ralph Waldo Emmerson once said, “Good manners are made up of petty sacrifices”
Whether he knew it or not, Ralph touched on an eternal principal here. He understood that every desire we have requires some kind of sacrifice. While being well mannered doesn’t require cutting of your own arm, it does require a certain amount of effort.
When I was a young boy I was out at the store with your grandma and grandpa one afternoon when I saw something I really wanted. It was some sort of computer game and I knew I had to have it. So I took my find over to where my parents were and asked if they would buy it for me. It wasn’t very expensive so I totally expected them to tell me to drop it in the cart. Instead Grandpa Rowe said, “What are you willing to do for it?” As a young boy, I was kind of stunned and didn’t know how to respond. He went on, “We can’t just give it to you. You have to do something to earn it. So what do you think you could do for us to earn that game?” A couple thoughts ran through my head. First, what on earth could a young boy like me do to earn that computer game. And second, do I really want the game bad enough to earn it? It was one thing when I thought my parents would just buy it for me, but now there was going to be work involved.
Finally we came to the agreement that I would go home and mow the lawn and then I could have the game. At this time in my life I already mowed the lawn on a regular basis, and probably would have mowed the lawn that day no matter what. But my dad helped me understand a valuable lesson. Everything we want in this life requires some sort of sacrifice. Even if Grandpa had just bought me the game, he still had to sacrifice and go to work every day in order to earn the money necessary to buy the game.
Throughout your life there will be many things that you want, they may not be as trivial as my example or as dramatic as Aron’s example. But every time you set your sights on something or make a goal, you need to ask yourself, “What am I willing to put on the altar in order to achieve that goal?” If you are not ready to sacrifice enough, then there’s no sense making that goal. But I promise you that if you put enough on the altar you can achieve any goal you set in your life.
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